Saturday, 29 April 2017

Half-Way to 1 Year (Almost) .... Advice Appreciated XX

Hi everyone,

172 days so almost half-way to a year and was hoping to read a bit of advice from those who made it to and past this point (or didn't and are still trying xx).

I noticed the last few weeks (it has stopped for now) that I was pretty close to thinking I could have a drink or two again.  Really very almost did it too - which is the closest I have been since giving up.

The scary thing is that in the beginning of this journey, I was fighting the urge to drink but I would consider that time as more of a violent reaction, this latest feeling so was passive and "normal" that it scares me WAY more.

I almost "rationally" and "calmly" had a drink.   WTF??

Very glad I didn't but how did I get so close?

M xx

11 comments:

  1. I think the novelty of being sober wears off, it's easy to forget how terrible we felt before. I'm feeling better now too, and I think these stages come and go. I definitely don't think about alcohol daily anymore which is great, but also makes me feel like perhaps if be OK to have a drink or two. But it won't be alright I know that. Almost half way, no turning back now!

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    1. Yes no turning back now! I feel like I have to deal with a whole new series of mental issues now. I can understand the attraction of not wanting to have to face this! But going to keep at it
      thanks so much PDTG
      M xx

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  2. PDTG has a really good point.
    It's so easy to remember the good times only.
    I had to think through the end of that drink/drinks/bottle.
    I have a nasty list of all that happens to me when I drink, as well as a list of all the nasty things I did.
    It's not pretty, which is the point.
    It was very helpful in my first year.
    I also had a "good" list, but it was the nasty stuff that helped me from drinking the most.
    I had thoughts of being able to moderate the first time I tried to get sober, I went back to drinking, and then, my drinking was right back to being awful.
    Keep reaching out for support.
    This is the hardest thing I have ever done.
    Keep writing about your thoughts, and don't drink until you hear from one of us!
    xoxo
    Wendy

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    1. Don't drink until you hear from one of us! I really love this Wendy :)
      and am listening hard :)
      M xx

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  3. Congrats on your progress so far. I am not there yet and striving to get there. Everything the previous two people posted makes total sense. I have not had many alcohol cravings at all so far and consider myself lucky. I have had way more sugar cravings, which is a separate issue. When I have had a wine craving, I think back to the first two times I stopped, then tried moderation. It worked for a while- until it didn't. Then I was worse off than the time before. I will never forget the last time I drank. It was so awful and I felt so damaged on many levels. Never wanting to feel that way again and how good I feel now is keeping me motivated.

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    1. I also know that moderation is a slippery slope straight back to whence I came!
      Not wanting to go all the way back that's for sure
      thanks for you kind thoughts and sorry to hear the sugar bug has got you - but I hear that is so common out there. One addition to another, the good news is the sugar is hard but won't annihilate your soul which is a very big positive !
      Michelle xx

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  4. I know exactly how you feel. I am almost at a year and am so happy about this. I release though that I will never be able to stop working on this. I get feelings about wanting a drink sometimes and kid myself that I could have just the one but know that I would then have another and another and be in hell before too long. I don't really have advice on how to deal with it, except to say this will pass and you will move on to a different and better stage of sobriety. Then it will pop back and smack you around the head and you will be like "fuck you just go away!" Then, again, it will go away and you will feel all super again. It's like life I suppose ... i checked back to see what my 6 month post was and it is basically a massive list on how to not have that drink! So maybe I was thinking then what you are thinking now. Xxxx

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    1. thanks for reading back over your posts to give this info - it really helps to know the "norms" we have over this process.

      Makes the world of difference having support
      thanks SP xx
      M

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  5. Complacency. Plus we are constantly bombarded by advertising that shows just how important drinking is to having a fun life.
    But we know better.
    In the end, ask yourself...do you really want one small drink? Or do you want to get drunk?

    None is a million times better. Hold on to your stillness and peace!
    Anne

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  6. This was my though in this earlier on...

    So you want one glass??? | ainsobriety
    https://ainsobriety.wordpress.com/2014/10/08/so-you-want-one-glass/

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    1. Umm - Numb not drunk. It is just as bad, you are so right it is a pathway to nowhere good when you are an addict.

      Thanks so very much for the support - it really helps so much
      Michelle xxx

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